The Personal Abyss

Im standing on the outside looking in. Watching my own personal train wreck but somehow the winds of change have blown and I cannot stop it. Watching things that at one stage of my journey were held so dear. Hopes dreams and moments of extreme happiness. Now replaced with an ever increasing sense of for bode, almost like knowing a storm is coming but unable to change the course of it. Watching those things that you once held so dear slip through your fingers. Standing alone again on the edge of changing decisions, trying to find some sense in what’s happening but not really grasping the full consequence of what each individual decision made will bare. But this is infinitely bigger that who I am personally, for its not only me in my own evolution that is changing. The energy of those things I loved are also infinitely changing. Decisions have been made that have inherently been so deeply shifted from my personal view on things, and on a world scale the world in which we live has changed. I found today that nearly 10 years ago I drew a picture of the moon goddess howling at the moon, today I found someone else’s interpretation of the same concept nearly 10 years later. See when I drew that picture I was on the precipice of change, has this image returned to me at this moment as a sign that I am about to move through this phase again. The very foundations of what I believe in again tested. How sweet it would be to return to that dark place I once did so I could hide, only this time I know I cannot.

10 years ago I drew this.

Today I found this






~ by turukai on September 26, 2011.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: